A GREY WORLD

Hello again, loves!!

In the latest poll I took with all my friends about what I should post about, it was a tie between "life lately" and "How the world is grey". I'm actually super excited about this tie, cause that means the tie breaker is me and I get to pick ;) To be deep for once instead of relaying my life events to you (check my insta for that ;)) I decided on "how the world is grey".

This may be quite the confusing topic by just the name. A grey world? What does that even mean?

The other day I got a text from one of my best friends ((yes, that's you, Fitzgerald)). She was asking me if she could share her research paper with me and if I could give her feedback and help her write an ending to it. I said yes in a heart beat, and if you, the reader, know me well, then you know why. I love this friend, I love writing, and I have a strange love for essays (thanks to my 11th grade English teacher, actually).

Her paper was about a book series, and why it should be considered adult literature as well as children literature. The books series is one of my favs so I was excited to start reading.

One of the things she talked about was the "grey characters" in the books. A reoccurring theme in these books is "good vs. evil" and good character and evil characters. She mentioned some of the characters that were neither good nor evil, but somewhere in between. They were not black or white, but grey.

She went on to say how everyone character in the book, whether good or evil, actually is grey to some degree. The good characters sometimes have evil in them and the evil characters have some good.

The whole world is like this, isn't it? Maybe you won't agree with me there, but I find that more often than not, it's true. Even my most beloved friends have disappointed me, and my worst enemies have shown me kindness. I have found that every good person has darkness in them, and getting to know people I don't like at first has made me realize that they are actually wonderful.

Is that crazy? I always tell my mom that my fatal flaw is that I am too compassionate. I love people way too much. So much, in fact, that the death penalty actually makes me sick (saying that isn't to start a political feud, but it really really does sicken me. I hate it).

I was in church the other day, and we were discussing hell and heaven and the afterlife. Someone mentioned what will happen to evil people, and they brought up Hitler as an example. Everyone was so angry, which, of course, they have a right to be. But I sat there, shocked, listening to the kindest people in my life talk about this man, that they had never personally known, and say they were hoping he was damned to hell.

Now I'm not saying Hitler shouldn't be severally punished for his actions, and I'm not saying this is about Hitler at all.

All I'm saying is, when did we lose hope in people? When did we lose hope that in this life, or the next, that they will progress and become better? When did we stop giving people second, third, fourth, and fifth chances?

Granted, some people are very very very bad, but I think the day we stop seeing the good in those people is the day that we are all doomed.

And, also, we forget that good people can do bad things.

I was watching a scary movie a while back. Usually scary movies are known for having 0 plot, no character development, and lot's of pop outs. This scary movie was like the rest I'd seen, only having a small plot and very disturbing images, but something was very different. It wasn't something big, it was just a simple quote. This is how it went down:

"Are you a cop?"
"I used to be." 
"Did you catch a lot of bad guys?"
"No, I didn't catch any bad guys. I only caught good people having really bad days." 
"Why'd you stop being a cop?"
"I was tired of only seeing people on their bad days."

(Probably not exactly what was said, but that's how my memory recalls it)

 I don't know about you, but geez, that hit home. And in that moment I knew that this scary movie had said what I had always thought, that bad people aren't bad people, they are just good people dong bad things, having bad days.

That's why the world is grey. Because the people are grey. And even those who are good, they have some degree of grey in them. And those people who are bad, have good in them too. The whole world is like this.

Honestly, I couldn't tell you if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Would I rather it be strictly black and white? I don't think so. I like the challenge of finding good in absolutely everyone. I like being compassionate and sympathetic and loving (okay, I admit, I'm not perfect, but I try!)

I like my world grey.

I guess the question is, do you?

Thanks for reading, again. Sorry if this was a rambling post, but it's just been on my mind for a long time. Thanks for taking the time to read what's in my thoughts, for paying attention to silly old me and my dreams. Again, it means so much to me.

Signing off until next time, 
Ella Frances Waite